The Infamous Assblaster

This story is of possibly the most life changing event I have ever experienced. It takes place deep in the heart of Cabo San Lucas Mexico during spring break 2008. Schwarty, Adonis, Schwarty's Dad, and Jorge (Schwarty's Dad's friend) have just landed in Cabo and of course our first instinct is to begin drinking. A beer at lunch, a shot in the room, 4-5 shots in the pool, and 2-3 beers on the beach qualify as our  pre game before we go out. Beers with dinner followed by a series of no less than five drinks out on the town were all consumed before we met this group of girls. It's around 11:30 and Adonis, Schwarty and myself are walking to a club when we run into three fairly attractive girls on the sidewalk. We invite them to go to the club only to find out that they are all 17 so they can't get in. We decide to save money on a bribe to the bouncer by just going to little bars all around. We drink a couple more shots and decide to head back to the hotel. In the back of the shuttle. Me and one of the girls start making out and as soon as we get back to the room we immediately lock ourselves alone in the bedroom. I black out at this point but I do remember changing my condom in the middle because we had been at it for around 45 minutes and it was getting dry. A total of an hour and a half after we arrive, I am getting dressed to walk this girl back to her room and she says, "I've never done that before..."

Startled I say, "What? Seriously? You were a virgin? That isn't cool you need to warn a man before you let him take your v-card."

"No I wasn't a virgin...I have never done it in the ass before..."

...Pause here and try to imagine what was going through my head. I had no intention of fucking this girl in the ass, barely any recollection of doing so, and no idea at the time that I just had.

"But we didn't do it in the ass", I say.

"Yes we did."

"No we didn't!"

"Yeah we did!"

"DAMMIT!"

I walked her all the way home, got back to my room, told Schwarty and Adonis what had happened, and was hence christened the Assblaster.

PS I don't remember that girls name but I do know that she called me every single night we were in Mexico.